Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Off to the Allergy Doctor...

This week I'm taking my daughter to the allergy doctor for her yearly testing. My daughter is one of the 4% of kids with a food allergy (dairy, to be exact). We've been dealing with her allergy for a year now -- it's been hard at times, surprisingly easy at others. But I'm ready for it to be over.

We are lucky in that my daughter's symptoms are: 1) not that serious to date (though the doctor says that could change with any reaction); and 2) likely to go away over time. (I think an estimated 50% of kids with a dairy allergy outgrow it by age 3; she just turned 2.) And while my daughter handles her allergy remarkably well (she understands that at Dunkin' Donuts her sister can have donuts while she gets a bagel, and at the pizza place her sister can have pizza while she gets pasta), we did have an incident this past week in which my daughter became very upset that she couldn't have some of her sister's birthday cake. It's so tough to explain to a 2-year-old that she just can't eat certain foods.

I genuinely feel for those parents (and their children) who have to deal with far more serious -- and multiple -- food allergies, and who can't say like I can, "I hope it will be over soon." Because for their kids, it's more likely to be a life-long allergy. In our year of dealing with this allergy, I have learned that far too many people do not understand enough about food allergies (especially at restaurants, which is very scary) -- and some people are just downright cruel about them. I had a former co-worker with a tree nut allergy, and she used to tell this story about how a former colleague baked brownies for the office, and purposely told this woman that there were no walnuts in them -- even though there were -- because she wanted to see what her reaction would be. I laughed at the story at the time; now it just makes my skin crawl to think that someone would endanger another person's life (yes, allergies are *life-threatening*) like this.

I have a lot to say on food allergies and not enough time in the day, so I'll save most of it for future posts. I'll just say for now to please be understanding about food allergies. Those with food allergies (and their parents) do not mean to be any type of a burden, but allergies really are a matter of life and death.

I had a conversation several months ago with a woman at the New England Chapter of the Asthma and Allergy Foundation about food restrictions at school due to allergies. We were talking about parents who get upset that their kids can't bring in peanut butter to school or whatever else, and she told me that what she'd say to these parents is, "Do you really want to be the person to endanger a child's life?" And really, that's what it boils down to. I realize that at a restaurant (or as a guest at someone else's house) I can be full of questions about ingredients and how things are prepared. I really don't mean to inconvenience you, but this is my child's health and well-being (and possibly her life) on the line. I wish everyone could understand that.

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